Human civilization is basically a civilization of mothers

 

"Once upon a time, there was no concept of 'father' in the world. People did not know that men could play any role in giving birth to children. Human civilization is basically a civilization of mothers. The Trobians believed that children were born because a ghost called 'baloma' entered girls. When did baloma enter? When girls went to bathe in deep water, then. If a girl said, 'I was bitten by a fish,' then society would assume that baloma had entered her; within a few days, her stomach would swell. But baloma only entered the stomachs of those girls with whom boys had close association. When Malinowski saw a baby in the house of an unmarried girl and asked, 'Who is the father of the child?' The Trobians did not understand the question. However, after explaining it, the answer came, 'A father is not needed to have a child. Baloma gave the child.'

The Melanesians used to say that while married women have children because of their husbands, unmarried women have children because of food. Reasons. Girls get pregnant by eating certain foods. That is, the importance of the husband that is in the present society, was not there for a long time in human society. Even not all husbands and wives lived together. Many lived with their mothers after marriage. Children were exclusively the property of the mother. People did not ask the question, who is your father. Many husbands secretly had sex with their wives. The family was centered on the mother and brother. The bond between brothers and sisters was stronger than the bond between husband and wife. The brother had more authority over the children than the husband. When Darius took the initiative to kill the family of Intafarnes, Intafarnes' wife saved her brother instead of saving her husband. She told Darius, if her husband died, she would have a husband, if her son died, she would have a son, but if her brother died, she would not have a brother. There are examples of this in ancient literature as well. Antigone died because of her brother, not because of her husband. Her brother Polynices was more important to her than her husband Polynices.

When Christian missionaries went to Melanesia to preach, no one understood. But when it was said, God is Jesus' uncle, everyone understood. In other words, the great importance of fatherhood and husbandhood in institutional religions is a very recent invention. For thousands of years, women have been walking the earth without the authority of their husbands.

I am not saying that the relationship between husband and wife should become unimportant, or that wives should torment their husbands. What I want is that the relationship between husband and wife should not be forced. That the cabin should not become more important than love. The wife has to take permission from her husband at every step, or the husband has to explain himself to his wife every minute, such an authoritarian relationship is not good. I want the husband and wife to consider themselves one body and one mind. They should give each other what belongs to each other. Orders, prohibitions, the sake of the scoundrel, the sake of bitter karalla, Let's not make each other's lives miserable with these things."

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—Mohiuddin Mohammad

Page 13, Book: Murtibhanga Project