Like a mother

 

Antara was carefully digging up the soil at the base of the tall, thin, almost bald rose tree behind the kitchen and mixing it with the boiled tea leaves she had stored. Her eyes fell on this tree through the kitchen window. The tree, which was out of place amidst the weeds and accumulated garbage, was desperately trying to prove its existence by spreading its branches despite all the neglect and care. Just like Antara.

This tree is also alone, no one loves it, no one even looks back. Yet it stands on its own like a shameless tree. From now on, Antara will love it. When he sees his tree, he remembers himself. Prashant smiles at Antara's care.

"You are working so hard! Will this tree survive? Even if it survives, it will not bloom, that's for sure. How can such a fussy tree survive like this!"

Antara does not answer. What is wrong with caring for it in her heart? No one knows more than she does how much the tree is suffering due to lack of love and care.

Antara still doesn't understand her place in this house. There are only two people in such a big house, now there are three including her. Her husband is calm, and her serious fifteen-year-old son. She hasn't been able to understand the boy for a long time. How can she understand, she doesn't even talk! The boy's father understands the boy, so Antara is no fool!

Antara has no job except taking care of her father and son and cooking. Does she even have any acquaintances? But this is enough for a girl like her.

A few months ago, one afternoon, she was called to her aunt's house to wash some dishes.

Antara ran to her, wiping her wet hands. Aunty looked at her carefully and said,

"Put on a nice saree and get dressed up a bit. Make three cups of tea and come back. A gentleman has come with your uncle."

Antara was not surprised. Nowadays, sometimes you have to go and sit in front of people in a hurry. Suddenly, both uncle and aunty felt that they needed to get him off their shoulders. Their daughter has also grown up, if people don't get Antara married before then, they will say it's bad!

She is over thirty. Still, Antara did not get to sit on the wedding ring. Of course, it is not uncle and aunty's fault. After that terrible accident when she was eight years old, one of her legs was broken so badly that she had no choice but to drag that leg for the rest of her life.

Of course, nothing got stuck because of her weak legs. She is equally skilled in all tasks like a normal person. She only has to walk a little while digging. That's why her price in the marriage market has decreased.

Antara had no regrets about not getting married. She had adapted well to her uncle's family. Only sometimes, while lying in bed, some muffled words would come out of the next room and fall on her ears, making her upset. How much longer would the girl have to be carried around, perhaps the night's sleep would have been wasted by the uncle and aunt. Antara thought why was she alive! Was it so important to be alive? Why did she have to come back alive from the accident that killed her parents? For what?

Finally, the marriage was done with the man. The man's name was Prashant Dutta. He was about forty-five years old, fifteen years older than Antara. At the time of the marriage, Antara was only afraid, who knew what Prashant Dutta would be like! One day, she caught a glimpse of him while holding a cup of tea in her hand. That look told her so much! Will the man love her? Her heart pounded as she remembered love.

The man probably had no choice but to marry a flawed girl. A year ago, his wife was in danger of dying. He needed someone who he thought would love and put the messy family back in order.

Antara was immersed in the dream of reorganizing her life, thinking that even if it was someone else's family, it would still be hers now. The first breakup occurred on the night of the flower bed. The man clearly explained,

"When we get married, you will have the dignity of being my wife. But remember that no third person will come between us. In this world, you will have to become my wife first, and my son's mother first. And you will have to remain his mother for the rest of your life. You can do it!"

Antara nodded her head without understanding anything. Her life had never been easy, how could it be easy today! In the meantime, she had to continue fighting for her own existence. Since that day, she has been trying her best to become the mother of her fifteen-year-old serious son rather than becoming Prashant Dutta's wife.

From the outside, everything in this world is hers. However, from the inside, Antara knows that nothing is hers. Even now, only one person's name is involved in everything in this world. Even after leaving, the one who has occupied the entire world. If that was the case, why did the man drag Antara into this strange world? He doesn't feel like showing his shameless presence in someone else's world. He can't seem to make the world his own. Whose fault is it, his own?

In a few days, the boy's big test will come. He is busy studying in his own room all the time. His husband's strict orders are that he must keep a special eye on his son. Antara must take care that he doesn't face any inconvenience.

In the evening, Antara walked towards his son's room with a glass of hot milk in her hand. Standing in front of the door, through a gap in the curtain, she saw Padmanabh reading in unison. Prashant and Mallika's beloved Piku. The boy looked exactly like his mother. Antara glanced at the picture of Mallika's smiling face hanging on the wall above Piku's study table. What luck that the lady had come! Even after leaving, she has occupied everyone. As husband, as son, he is in both their hearts.

Entering the house, Antara placed the glass of milk on the table in front of Piku and said,

"Drink the milk, Babu! Otherwise it will get cold."

"I'll eat it." Piku said without taking her eyes off the pages of the book. Antara stood for a while. She really wanted to put her hand on Piku's head, to hear his mother calling from his mouth. Antara wanted to find love for herself in his eyes. But she couldn't find the courage. She remembered the first time this boy tried to tidy up his messy, untidy room. At that time, one day, Piku was cleaning his mother's picture hanging on the table with a cloth, when suddenly Piku came and took the picture of his mother. He said to Antara in a very arrogant manner,

"Why did you enter this room? Why did you touch my mother's picture!"

"The picture was dusty. I was wiping it off." Antara tried to say it politely.

"No need! I'll wipe off my mother's picture! You go from this room."

Although the boy was saying these words in an arrogant manner, Antara somehow felt that he was hiding a huge pain behind his arrogance. The pain that he might not be able to touch even with a thousand attempts. He came out of Piku's room with his head bowed.

Shortly after Antara came out, Prashant entered his son's room. Their conversation could be heard clearly from the kitchen. Prashant was saying,

"She's your mother, Piku! Someone talks to your mother like this!"

"Mother! She's my mother!" Piku's voice was not restrained with sarcasm.

"Or what! I brought her to this house just because you were being neglected. Why can't you think of her as your mother! She takes great care of you!"

"I didn't need anyone in my mother's place, father! You probably needed her, that's why you brought her." Piku's arrogant reply.

"If you were so reluctant, why didn't you tell me earlier? I asked!"

"Would you listen if I told you!" Again, a touch of sarcasm in Piku's voice.

Prashant came out of his son's room in a helpless manner. Antara wanted to melt into the ground in shame. Why did the man bring him to this house! That night, Prashant said to Antara seriously,

"There is no need to enter Piku's house like this. When he doesn't like it."

Antara remained silent. Then she withdrew herself as much as possible. But sometimes, looking at the pitiful face of the lonely, motherless boy, she wanted to become his mother. She repeatedly asked Prashant about his likes and dislikes. She repeatedly tried to arrange his favorite dishes on the food plate. She kept an eye on him from afar, even if he was sick and tired.

Antara put down the glass of milk and looked at Piku with a single glance. As she was reading, Piku suddenly noticed. She frowned and said,

"What happened? Are you going to say something?"

This means that Antara doesn't like being here. Antara shook her head and left. She is trying her best to become a part of this world. But they are the ones pushing her away. How can both the son and the husband treat each other? Why is she in this world, she cannot understand.

One afternoon, Antara could not get out of bed due to a severe headache. She had been feeling feverish for two days. She did not do anything. Today Prashant is also not home. He has gone out for office work. The son returned from school a little early. He must be given something to eat! He got out of bed with difficulty and went to the kitchen.

In the afternoon, after returning from school, Piku eats something light. At night, they eat rice together. Now he does not have the strength to cook anything. He poured milk and cornflakes into a bowl. Piku likes this food quite a lot. He entered Piku's room with the bowl in his hand.

" Babu! Eat this food! I am not feeling well. That is why I could not cook anything."

Piku was lying on the bed. This time he sat up,

" What happened to you?"

"Nothing! I just have a headache! I'm going to lie down for a while! You eat your food!"

Antara went to her room on tired legs and lay down on the bed. Her body felt incredibly bad. Her head ached, she was vomiting. She felt so dizzy. She had a fever! As soon as she closed her eyes, she fell into a deep darkness.

Antara opened her eyes with a cold touch on her head. Piku was leaning towards her. What time is it now! Is it time for Piku to eat? Antara tried to sit up, staggering. Piku said in a worried voice,

"You have a lot of fever! Have you taken any medicine?"

"It's nothing! You'll get better!" Antara, who was overwhelmed, didn't notice that Piku wasn't telling her anymore. She got out of bed and walked towards the kitchen to prepare food for Piku. Then her head spun, the surroundings became dark. The moment she fell to the ground, two teenage hands caught her from behind.

As soon as she opened her eyes, Antara was dazzled by the bright light. Where is he lying? Her mind slowly cleared. She was lying in her own room. It was daytime now. Who knows what time it was! She couldn't remember anything after that clearly after that, she vaguely remembered Piku putting her to bed, and then she seemed to have given her some medicine, that's all that came to mind.

Where is the boy now! He didn't even eat last night! Antara sat up. His body feels much better now. As soon as he sat up, he was surprised. Who is that lying curled up at his feet! Why is Piku here? He carefully called out with his hand on his son's body,

"Piku! Babu! Get up!"

Piku sat up with a thud. He looked at Antara with sleepy eyes.

"What happened, Piku? You were sleeping here yesterday! What happened to me yesterday all of a sudden!"

Piku suddenly hugged him, startling Antara. And Antara could clearly understand that Piku was crying. She was stunned for a while. Then she said in a soft voice,

"What happened, Babu? What happened?"

"I was so scared yesterday! I thought that just as my mother had left me, you would also leave! I called you so many times, but you didn't respond!" Piku said in a gushing voice.

Tears welled up in Antara's eyes. Who knows the pain of losing a mother better than Antara! Antara understands how the boy is enduring this pain.

Antara puts her hand on Piku's head. After all this time, a soft, innocent teenager has broken through his shell of seriousness and stood in front of Antara. He wants to forget the pain of losing his mother and clings to her. This is exactly the kind of love Antara wanted! Even if it's not his mother, Piku has become like his mother after all this time!

Prashant arrived in the afternoon.

"Yesterday Piku called because he was so scared! I came running! Are you okay now?"

Antara smiled softly and bowed her head. She thought to herself, there is a way out if he doesn't get better now! How could he be worse off after finding so much love!

In the afternoon, while pouring water at the base of the rose tree, she was surprised. Young leaves have grown on that tree. When the leaves have grown, how long will it be before the flowers bloom? Antara whispered.

"Listen! I'm not alone anymore! Just like you! Just as the young leaves have embraced you with love, just like this world has embraced me with love and affection. I won't have to walk the rest of the way alone anymore, what do you say!"

Madhavi_Bhattacharya